Fish

Two goldfish are in a tank... one looks at the other and asks, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"

So I was fishing last Friday afternoon at a little lake outside of Millington. It's about 157 degrees outside and a thunderstorm is blowing in so we figure we are not going to do any good, but whatever, I get off at noon on Friday so it sounds like a good time to take the boat out... So, as crazy as it might be we start catching fish... This lake has a 14-18 slot limit and you are only allowed to keep 1 fish over 18... so a couple hours into the afternoon we are culling 18+ inch fish... We end up keeping about 7 under 14" and two over 18". But the real kicker of the story was me pulling some Timmy Horton $h!t out of my @$$... I was reeling in my Bass Pro Shops XPS Professional Series Deep Diving Crankbait in a Olive Shad pattern, and boom... the line jumps, about pulls the rod out of my hand but I regain my grip and swing the tip to the side setting the hook. So I go about reeling in the fish, but something seems wrong, there is no fight, just a steady heavy weight on the other end so I get upset and figure I just have some more grass or something. So I get it close enough to be able to see and low and behold, I have a 4.5 pounder on the front hook of my plug and a 3.5 pounder on the back hook... craziest stuff I have ever seen not to mention the most weight, aside from a log or a spare tire or a drum or a catfish or anything else typically not found in a Tennessee impoundment, that I have ever gotten back to the boat. I have seen Timmy Horton, Bassmaster Elite Series competitor, do this three times on television in tournaments, but to see it in real life... amazing...

I am a hero...